Event Etiquette & Vetting
We’ve been thrilled to see so much interest in our recent events—from both new faces and familiar friends. As our community continues to grow, we want to take a moment to share how we welcome and vet new attendees, and to set clear, friendly expectations so everyone can enjoy our events safely and comfortably.
Purpose
The purpose of this document is twofold:
To explain the vetting process for all TNG events and ensure attendees understand what is expected before and during our events.
To provide clear guidelines around etiquette so that our spaces remain safe, respectful, and welcoming for everyone.
Whether you're a new or a seasoned member of the community, this guide is meant to help you engage with our events confidently and responsibly.
Scope
This document covers the expectations, vetting process, and etiquette for all TNG-hosted or affiliated events, including:
Munches / Sloshes
Community Events (lake days, hikes, bowling nights, etc.)
Educational Events (workshops, panels, Q&As, etc.)
Parties
Definitions
Munch/Slosh: A casual, social gathering in a public or semi-public venue. This gathering is usually centered around food and/or drink.
Vetting: A process by which we get to know potential attendees to ensure alignment with our community’s values and standards.
Purgatory: Informal term used to describe when someone’s RSVP is pending more information or red flags need clarification before approval.
RSVP: A request to attend an event; it does not guarantee acceptance.
SNS: Shorthand for ‘Social Networking Site’.
Why We Vet
Vetting helps us create events that are safe, respectful, and welcoming for everyone. It allows us to get a sense of who you are, what you’re looking for, and how you engage with others in community spaces. This process isn't about judgment—it's about ensuring that everyone who attends shares a commitment to consent, kindness, and mutual respect. It also helps us maintain an inclusive and supportive culture in line with our group values.
RSVP does not equal guaranteed attendance. You may be asked additional questions or declined based on past behavior observed at our events and/or within the community, feedback from other attendees, or lack of information on your profile. Please reach out to Denver TNG regarding the status of your RSVP if you have questions or believe you have been declined erroneously.
Why Your RSVP Was Declined
If your RSVP to attend our events was declined, it could be due to the following:
You are outside of the age range for Denver TNG (19-35), and we are not able to connect you to a younger partner who is attending the same event.
You have a known history of predatory, aggressive, or harmful behavior.
You've been banned from other queer communities without a transparent resolution.
You have shared the event locations with others who did not RSVP in the past.
You are currently a part of a group that hurts marginalized communities.
You have demonstrated inappropriate and/or malicious behavior at one of our past events.
You have been asked to leave one of our past events before.
You demonstrate predatory, aggressive, and/or harmful behavior with your SNS activity.
Why Hasn't My RSVP Been Accepted?
If you have RSVP'd at one of our events, and it hasn't been accepted, do not fret. There's probably a reason for that, including (but not limited to):
You're new and/or have never been to one of our events, thus we don't recognize your username.
Your membership profile is empty, or does not contain any meaningful information.
You demonstrate entitlement, poor boundaries, or a “pickup” mindset in messages with us or within your SNS activity.
Concerns have been raised by other community members, but not confirmed. In this case, we may reach out to clarify or discuss further.
We reserve the right to ask any attendee to leave due to their behavior at our events.
Event Etiquette
You’ve been accepted to attend one of our events—awesome! We’re genuinely excited to welcome you. Before you arrive, though, there are a few important expectations we ask all attendees to keep in mind to help ensure a positive experience for everyone.
Here’s what to keep in mind before showing up:
Community First: Come to meet people and contribute to a supportive environment. Come ready to meet people and be part of something supportive. Ask about someone’s hobbies, interests, or favorite memes. It goes a long way.
No Targeting: Please don’t attend an event solely to pursue one specific person unless they’ve invited you directly. Our gatherings are for everyone, and it's important that all attendees feel comfortable and free from pressure.
Be Present: Whether you're just starting out or have years of experience, approach each event with curiosity, respect, and an open mind. Every community has its own culture, and taking time to learn how we do things helps everyone feel welcome.
Respect Boundaries: Consent is at the core of everything we do—and that includes respecting people’s social, emotional, and physical boundaries. A “no” is always enough, and it doesn’t need to be justified or negotiated with. Don’t push, pester, or try to change someone’s mind. Respect also means honoring people’s privacy. Use the name and pronouns someone gives you. Everyone deserves to feel safe and in control of how they share themselves in community spaces.
Dressing Appropriately: Some of our events, specifically munches, sloshes, and community day events, happen in public spaces. Now is not the time to bring out your Pride rave outfits. Not only does dressing inappropriately risk Denver TNG’s relationships with our venues, it also risks conflict with other patrons.
General Rules
Ask before touching anyone, including hugs.
Don’t assume someone’s life story or experience.
Use names and pronouns respectfully
Keep conversations inclusive—avoid gatekeeping or “one true way” thinking
If in doubt, ask a facilitator.
Munches/Sloshes
These are public events—dress and act accordingly
Keep conversations respectful
Be mindful of new attendees—help make space for them
Educational Events
Arrive on time and give presenters your full attention
Participate respectfully—don’t interrupt or dominate discussions
Follow any posted rules or instructions given by facilitators
Community Day Events
These are typically public events—dress and act accordingly
Be inclusive—make an effort to talk to someone new
Respect the venue and any rules in place (especially at public parks or rented spaces)
These events are more casual—come ready to socialize and connect
What To Do if You Feel Unsafe
Our goal is to create spaces where everyone feels respected, supported, and safe. That said, we recognize that issues can still arise—and when they do, we want you to know that you're not alone and that we take all concerns seriously. Whether it’s a small discomfort or a serious violation, your experience matters. Speaking up helps protect not just yourself, but the integrity of the space for everyone.
When to Speak Up
Please say something if you notice or experience:
Violations of consent or boundaries
Persistent unwanted attention or someone refusing to take “no” for an answer
Harassment, intimidation, bullying, or manipulative behavior
Someone attending with a known history of abuse or misconduct (even if indirect or secondhand—organizers may not be aware)
A person being visibly intoxicated, impaired, or unsafe to themselves or others
Behavior that could risk the venue itself—such as underage drinking, illegal activity, or drawing negative public attention to Denver TNG events
A person with a disruptive or harmful reputation re-entering community spaces (even if their behavior seems fine now—pattern recognition matters)
A situation or person you can’t fully explain, but that feels wrong or off to you
Your report doesn't have to be "serious" to matter. Even something as simple as someone consistently making people uncomfortable, exhibiting poor hygiene that affects the space, or hogging shared equipment can impact the event. We’d rather hear early than too late.
Reporting at an Event
If something happens during an event, please reach out to a facilitator right now. They’ll be clearly identified—usually with badges, wristbands, or lanyards. You can speak with them directly or ask for a private space to talk. You won’t be expected to explain everything in the moment if you’re not ready, but sharing any details you're comfortable with will help us respond appropriately. We’re here to listen without judgment, and we’ll take your concerns seriously and handle them with care. Supporting your safety is our priority, and you won’t face retaliation for coming forward.
Reporting After the Event
If you weren’t ready or able to report during the event, that’s okay. You can still reach out afterward—your experience is still valid, even if some time has passed. Until our official reporting form is live, you can message the Facilitator team directly with:
Your preferred name
A description of what happened
Where and when the incident occurred
The names or handles of anyone involved (if known)
Any context that could help us understand the situation
Whether you would like a follow-up from us.
